A Midlife Crisis

December 29th, 2013

I realize no one seems to be talking about your upcoming birthday. Have you been shopping for a mid-life crisis?
Love, Your Uncle

January 1st, 2014

Me:  You don’t really like to play with your Lego once it’s built, do you?
Our Three Year Old:  Sometimes I like to play with it, but not most of the time. I like to take it apart and build it again all day long.
Me:  Hmmm.  Your set for 7-12-year-olds seems too easy for you.  Is it?
O3YO:  I could do 12 plus.
Me:  Oh my. Well, maybe we’ll have to get you a 12+ Lego set for your fourth birthday.  Let’s do a little Google search.
O3YO:  It’s Jamie!!
Me:  Ooooo.  We love Jamie. He’s our best friend.

Me:  Well, a Lego French Restaurant looks pretty good to me. That’s a much better 12+ set than the Castle one.
O3YO:  You know what MaMa?  We could get that for your birthday. Then we could do it together.
Me:  What a great idea!

January 2nd, 2014

My Husband:  What do you want to get MaMa for her birthday?
O3YO:  A French Restaurant.
MH: What?
O3YO:  A French Restaurant, Papa!!
MH:  You mean you want to take her to a French Restaurant?
O3YO:  Nooooo! We want to build a French Restaurant.

January 3rd, 2014

Dear Uncle,
You know, one of the things about having kids later in life-there’s just no time to shop for the right mid-life crisis. This leaves me extremely vulnerable to any old crisis that might come along.
Love, Me

January 4th, 2014

My Husband:  Elizabeth, about your birthday.  I know we’re going to dinner and that’s what you chose to celebrate your fortieth, but there’s something I want to get…
Me:  Oh, you know-it’s so crazy. I went online and the Lego French Restaurant is so expensive.  It’s even more expensive to get it in Australia.  It’s a little silly for a toy, I mean, it would be really fun to have.  Maybe my dad could get it somehow, and ship it here?  Ow!! Why are you squeezing my shoulders so hard?
MH:  Look at me.  I want to get you something for your birthday-for your fortieth birthday-for the birthday of a grown woman, something really nice I think you’ll love. It’s not Lego. Do you REALLY want Lego for your fortieth birthday?
Me:  Oh my God, I think I do.
MH: Ok.  Well, you think about it a little more. I’m going to work. Should I call someone to come over and sit with you or are you going to be alright?

he wanted to get me this

January 6th, 2014

Me:  This day could not have been any better. The breakfast, the cake you two made, that beautiful perfume from Le Labo.  But, just watching the two of you together in the pool- so healthy and beautiful made me feel so lucky.  I’m so lucky to greet forty from this vantage point.  Thank you.
MH:  You’re welcome, kid. Happy Birthday. Are you ok I didn’t get you Lego?
Me:  I can’t say for sure.

One comment

  • Bless you! One of these days we’re going to bump into each other in Fairway —I just know it! I’ll put some UWS NYC photos in my Instagram queue so watch that space…

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